Sunday, July 4, 2010

Thursday's Therapy (2 of 2) ~ Suck It Up

Life isn't fair.

I know this.

I have known this.....


I don't cannot accept this.

I cannot accept that unqualified people will always get the promotion that someone else deserves simply because they know the man sitting next to the gosh darn man.

I cannot accept that irresponsible people will always find someone to pick up their slack therefore never being forced to act/be responsible.

I cannot accept that simply because I did not create the problem that the problem is not mine to solve.

So, my sister has had another baby. Her 3rd in two and a half years. It's funny what's important to people when they have their own garbage and mess all locked up in the closet. I say this because when people hear this they always go off on a tangent about birth control. Birth control won't fix her or the problem. My sister needs help. I know this. . Her parents know this. Even Chucky's Bride knows this. It would appear that my sister is the only clueless one. I understand her plight....well, I get it. She is searching for love. For something or someone to love her. I am on that same journey, just a different road.

I knew babies came to be loved, not to love. This is why Chucky's only living siblings are on his paternal side. This single parent stuff is for the birds. Believe that. I mean I have seen people who make it look easy, especially when they pulling in the big dough and got an army ready to support them, standing behind them. I'm not sure who my sister has outside of her mother.

I'm not sure who I have. I'm not sure what I would do in her situation. I'm not sure of a lot of things right now. But, I do know this. I have to keep this baby, even though deep down I don't want to. I have to break the circle or at least make an attempt. I have to stand up to my family's demons. I have to affect the change I wanted to see when I was growing up a motherless, fatherless child.

So since I received that text that stated 'bad news, you gonna have to keep her til December' I have been pouting and stomping my feet. Shouting what about me? What about what I want? What about what I want to do? What about all my plans I have made since your last text that you were getting her June 19th and keeping her? What about...

Yeah, it's not about what I want, it's about what I need to do...

Farewell Never Neverland.

"Life isn't fair. Many times on this journey we will find out that the choices we have to make are not necessarily the choices we want to make, they are simply the ones we need to make. Life comes at you fast, make sure you react accordingly."

~Gotta Luv Moi, Cuz I Surely Do (Smooches)


  1. You have your sister's baby? Sorry I'm confused...I hope you are okay. Thinking of you. XX

  2. Do what you feel is best and in the process help your sister to learn the lesson here. You can't be expected to continually put your life, hopes and dreams on hold in order to bail someone out.

    Hope I'm not out of line.

  3. @Chic mama..yell Chucky's Bride is my niece..i got her in Decemeber.. i blogged about it back then...i think

    @Chele, no you are not out of a matter of fact you are dead on..i have filed for child support from her and her baby daddy.. and in the meanwhile, i am living..or at least learning how to live..
    one day we need to meet up to eat wings, drink and be lazy ; )

  4. Wings? My favorite! Drinks? My second favorite!

  5. well, one thing about the new me, I don't say it unless I mean it so let me know what months are better than other