Thursday, September 10, 2009

Trying of My Faith

The Devil tried my faith.....

and he almost won.

But I prayed.

Yes, I got down on my knees and I prayed. And I prayed, and prayed. I even prayed some more.

I said: "Dear God, please let me find the sucka who has done this to my child so that I can bust him to the white meat. And dear God, please let me find his parents so that I can do the same to them. Amen."

Now I do understand that we have some outta town guests that have stopped by to rest their feet or maybe just to eat up all our good food. And I am sure some of them may be reading this and glancing to the right side of my blog and rereading that and thinking this doesn't sound very loving of Luv. Well, you need to read 10 to Life and then you will see that my Only busting them to the white meat would be very loving on my part.

So anyways, after several days of searching and suffering from excruciating headaches and sleepless nights I decided to pray a different prayer:

"Dear God, now I know you know that had this happened a year or so ago that there would be no praying on my part...I would have reacted by now and someone or someones would be dead. That person no longer exists so please help me get through this even if I cannot make sense of it. Amen."

And well, I finally went to sleep. And when I woke up, I was still mad as all out doors AND I still wanted to bust a cap in someone, anyone (I kept telling Jill Scott that if I hurt someone I would feel so much better) AND I still wanted answers BUT the rage was gone from my heart.

"Often times the right decision is not the popular choice and it sometimes comes at high price. We all fall down and sometimes we are even pushed down; nevertheless, all that really matters is what you decide to do before you get back up. If someone tells you that they have never fallen, it's because they have yet to realize they were always lying on their backs."

~Gotta Luv Moi, Cuz I Surely Do (Smooches)


  1. Ask God to deliver you from your madness and then let vengence be His.

  2. Yeah, that's exactly what I had to do once I allowed myself to pray in harmony with his will. Cuz believe me it is madness

  3. I understand how you feel... about beating someone to the white meat as well as "why should my child have to go through this"...

    Embed in your brain that whoever did this will not be happy, will not live fruitfully, will not rest easy because of the havoc they have caused.

    My prayers & positive thoughts are with you & your child.

    I find that when I fall asleep mad, I wake up mad too. Clear your thoughts before bed and, Mama, you've gotta release the anger. I know you will... in time.

  4. Thanks lady I know I have to and I will...and I am.

    This has only slowed me down, it will not stop me.

    I am on a mission.

    A mission of LOVE