Thursday, January 22, 2015

Dear Me,

I don't always get it right, no matter how hard I try.  There is so much that has affected me when it comes to giving my heart.  I know it's crazy for those who have never walked my path, but I have been so broken that I am scared to even love myself.

Wonderful things have happened since I let them balloons go up.  I created space that allowed love to seep in.  Some love I could readily accept, other, I have to push on back out...everything ain't for everybody.  I went from faking it til I make it, to walking the walk instead of talking the talk.  Not only did I feel so lady, but I looked it too.  It was illuminating from my soul with such a glow that people often stopped me on the streets to inquire about it.  It's much to be said about a love so strong that it makes it impossible to hide because every inch of your body is telling on you.  Kool-aid smiles, skips in my step, song in my voice and glowing skin, all that from just letting love in.

It was a feeling that I never wanted to let go, a feeling that made all of those other awful experiences seem so far away, a feeling that I never wanted to forget, a feeling that I wanted to commemorate just in case I never felt this way again.

Loving you was allowing me to love me.  Wanting to give you my best meant that I had to first achieve my best.  I can't give you something that I don't have.  I embarked on the journey of self-love full of hope and excitement...I had finally tasted what it felt like to stand in the light of unconditional love.  From that love, I found the strength to tackle things that had held me paralyzed in fear for months....even years.  And before I knew it, I was sitting in a tattoo parlor declaring my love for all to see... and how fitting that tat was!

Gotta Love Me before I can truly love anyone else, and trust me when I say, "I love me some ME!"

"True love can't be denied, opening your eyes to a whole new world, a brand new day.  Can't you feel it?" ~Gotta Love Moi, Cuz I Surely Do......Smooches